best party night ever

we caught a bunch of great bands. By the way, I just got home, its 4:51am.

The bloobidiee bla or what ever from LA, they were cool, first act we caught at Arleen's. The lead singer was the bassist too, and she had a great head! She had these wonderful cheekbones, and long curly blonde hair, and her name was Kelly, it was awesome, Stephen said he'd do her dad.

Then we went to Luna and caught the Motel Creeps, and they were awesome, top notch stuff. We were bouncing between the Luna and Arleen's all night. Some militant asian chick scared us away from Arleen's as this 2 member band who were wearing bunny tails on their asses and plates on their tits singing about losing their virginity at 13 and then again to a bottle at 17, ended she was 61 something something. It was awesome, Brooklyn Dave made it, and we rocked! I had more to dink than I usually do. Stopped by the Crepes place, and it was delicous, and the lady making them was kinda hot. She told us women like sex. Yo, last band we caught at Arleens, Swiss Auto Club, there was this chick and I swear she was eyeing me, and she even ended up on my side. I didn't do anything of course, because I'm a giant pussy, I mean a good boy friend. This night was fucking awesome. After I dropped Dave off, we are heading back and I see on the other side of the Belt, a car on its side, facing the wrong directions, lights still on. CRAZY!!

We talked a little with the bands, got some of their CDs. I'm kinda drunk, maybe I will sleep. How the hell are we going to spend the day shopping and then party all night now? Guess I will have to sleep all of Sunday.

SATURDAY NIGHT 4/30/05

In honor of me, we will be having a friendly get-together at a fine club of ill-repute.
Phenomenon on Exit 43 on the BQE (30th Avenue Exit)
Cover will be 15
Big Joe says $50 is good enough for the night, $100 is better of course.
We will be meeting there after 10.

Check out the site for dress code and all other charges, they even have a map and directions.
Expected in attendance are:
Me, of course
Erika
Ronit +1 (maybe)
Anat
Stephen
Big Joe
Devang
Brooklyn David
Samurai David

(for future reference, you can click on pics I post here to see them larger, and if there is a link, the title will be the hyperlink, just like in this post)

1 more day

Its Friday, and party night is Saturday. Last night was fun, went to Tennessee Mt. with Stephen and Big Joe, had us some meat. MMMMM meeeeeeeeeet

Then I showed Big Joe the Brooklyn Promenade, and then the Astoria Park equivalent. So we ended up hitting the South and North coasts of the East River. It wasn't a photo night, we will do that some other time, after we get the tripod out of Stephen's Jetta. That avalanch is some truck. Funny though, we always see the luxery versions, the Cadilacs.

I sent Erika something special (in our email account sweety, you might not want to open in while in school)

Sinan wont be able to make it, apparently his finals are more important, go figure. Joe will be able to make it, so thats F'ing awesome, no worries then. Ronit might be bringing a friend, and unfortunately its not a lady, oh well.

"I've been doing time in the Universal Mind

oh, I've been turning keys
I've been setting people free"

I've been doing lots of thinking, and not enough of it makes it into perminant memory. I am going to make an effort to write down as many of my thoughts here as possible. Give this blog some depth.

Untill then, here is some accounts of my life! Last night I drove Stephen out to get the 'company car' which was the car the former Partner drove before he was, um, fired, so the other partner just kept the car. Its a Chevy Avalanch. That mother F'er is huge! I feel like I am on a boat when I am in it. Its pretty comfortable, but its Chevy, so its crap. Its white, what a crappy color for a truck (mine is white too). The arm rest compartment, is more like a cooler. Don't think you should store you beer there, but you could (I'm sure) store your drinks there with some of those frost element packets (Ice melts and turns to water, so that would be messy). You can stand on the damn section and be standing out of the car through the sunroof. Its very spacious. I think it is the perfect suburban party vehicle. Clearance to go over most things, big enough to be comfortable for you and your friends. Windows are big, and all of them open, including the rear window and sunroof, so its perfect for those suburban drives during the summer. Big rear, large cargo bed, can store lots of party goods there, and it can haul a boat. If I lived the suburban lifestyle, I would own one too. But the Partner was dumb, why did he get this when he could have gotten the luxery model that Chrysler has (same set up, but more expensive with more features), and why the hell did he get it in white?! It isn't a good car to have in the city, its gigantic, so thats stupid too. But you know what, I like it alot more than Stephen's Jetta. Stephen's boss was not like I expected. I expected someone tall and more uptight looking, and I was expecting a mansion with a semicircle driveway and electric gate. But he was short, kinda looked like a college guy, maybe a not crazy frat guy. He's in a 2 family house. His car is mad nice though. I like how when we were almost there, Stephen goes to me "no matter what, don't say anything, if he asks you about my driving skills...lie"

I think Erika is pissed at me because of last night. I was driving with my windows open and my music blasting through Long Island, when she called, and I yelled 'helllo1' because it was very noisy. I wasn't even sure who I was talking to, I thought it was Stephen calling. I lost reception, and couldn't get it back for a long time. I kept trying to call her back as I was driving. When I finally got reception I got a voice mail from her, and she was pissed. I called her back and she didn't pick up. I left her a messege from the road, and then again when I got home. She hasn't called me yet. She wanted me to be on the phone with her while she walked through the garage at her school. Its not my fault I had no recpetion! Its hard to drive and talk on the phone and close my windows and turn down the volume all at the same time. Its not like I did anything wrong on a personal level, just on the legal, talking on my cell with out a headset while driving. Like as if we all don't do that.

Big Joe is alive, he had food poisoning yesterday. Don't know if we are going out tonight. I have no idea how we are going to set up Saturday night, I was really relying on him to set things up. Ronit wanted to do something tonight, doubt any plans will fall through tonight though, just have a bad feeling...just a general bad feeling...maybe it has something to do with my sprite tasting nothing like sprite...I just don't know.

Thats a Wrap

This is the end of Tuesday night's photo session. Thats Stephen going up the steps leaving Flushing Meadow Park into the parking lot in Corona. I had to choose between this one and another picture to be the wrap up for the post, I went with this one because it involves less thinking to be understood. I like this low angle shot alot.

Welcome to Planet Earth

The Globe at Flushing Meadows Park, directly East of the Queens Art Museam, facing Northward.

I love those 2 lights to the right of it. It makes it seem like the sun over the horizon as the first light and the 2nd light is like the glimmer of that light reflecting on us, like as if we were viewing the planet from a space craft. The pictures seems so clear, and everything else is so dark, I love it.

The Core

I had taken this picture from the pedistal thing that holds the globe up. I climbed up on to it and took various pictures, I just thought I would post this one, not because it is necessarily the best one, but I think it looks best online. My favorit interior picture actually utilizes the juxteposition of the curves and angles better.

Queens Brough Bridge

Queens Borough Bridge/59th Street Bridge, looking Northward from a peer in Queens.

Stphen captured a really nice one of the bridge, but here is one of my pictures of it.

Someone approaches

Risk Assessment!

Someone came onto the prominad out of now where. Its me, Stephen, the darkness, and a lone smoking man coming toward us. We packed up and jetted.

Embrace the City

Stephen with his arms wide open, ready to embrace the city. We are looking at the city from Queens. You can see the Sears Tower, the really bright one toward center left, and you can see the UN Building on the left, next to Stephen. I wonder if its legal to take pictures of it...

The Midnight Snapper

This is a picture of Stephen setting up his camera in the dark. I love this picture. You just have to look at it really hard, or turn up your contrast and you will see his silhouette. I refuse to endit this picture, I am forcing you to look at it and see it for what it is. Making it easier would cheapen my art!

Snapping the Night Away

Last nigth we went out to take more pictures. We were looking for good vistas around Northern Queens next to LaGuardia. We didn't end up finding any good spots, but we did find the enterance to Riker's Island. We saw some potential vistas for later. But the thing is, Stephen's car was over heating, and its not like it was even hot out. His car is in the shop now. We ended up going to Flushing Meadows Park, and taking pictures there. Of the globe and through the globe. I will post those pictures up tonight probably, I have a good feeling my mom is done with her final paper. Stephen cut the night short because he had to go write some papers of his own. This cut in the opportunity to see Anat. I am to blame for that as well because I missed her phone calls and she ended up doing things with other friends. It worked out great for me though, because I got to have some GREAT phone sex that night, which I wouldn't have been able to if I was out doing whatever with Anat (she's not kinky, she's actually rather boring sexually).

As far as the plan is for tonight, I plan on going home and enjoying a night in, with my BBCa, Wednesdays is comedy night. To my disapointment they didn't start any new episodes of Coupling. But I will still enjoy Kumars at no. 42 and My Family which are new to me! And I'll have a chance to eventually put up those pics tonight. Its crap weather anyway.

CORRECTION:
the weather has really cleared up. But its sunny like a mother F'er, I was blinded walking past the winows. I might go home in an hour and take a nap. I 'slept' on the couch last night because my mom was working in my room all night. I am feeling sleepy now, and its only 4:00.

I forgot to mention that I was talking to Isabel today. Talked a little about how we changed since High School. Also talked about the beach. Specifically about the Robert Moses Beach east of Lot 5, which is the nude beach, definately gonna plan a trip there this summer. So far, Brooklyn David was the only one invited.

Midnight Snapper

Stephen and I spent part of our night taking pictures of the city from Queens. It might not have been legal for various reasons
1. We might have been in the park after it 'closes' although I didn't see a closing time posted.
2. I believe they passed laws against people taking pictures of bridges and tunnels.
3. The pier by the restaurant might have been private property.

But who the hell cares, it was mad fun. Some of the pictures are awesome. Stephen bought a tripod just for this activity. Tonight we might be doing this again. Gonna hit the Northern coast of Queens, or Brooklyn Heights, we'll see tonight. I will post our pictures here by the end of the week.

My mom is almost done with her Master's degree. I am still awaiting my response from CUNY.

I am feeling kinda down. Don't even have the will to jerk off. Thats some crazy talk, I know, but its true. I remember back in the day, when I was in High School, I would be jerking off at least 10 times a day, only taking a break because my hand would go stiff or my skin would be raw. And now, don't even want to bother. Its like I force myself sometimes, like when I am in the shower. I really need to get in a better state of being.

I would love to propose to Erika and ASAP, but I am just in such terrible shape right now. My law school chances look pretty slim, and every day I am less and less sure that is what I want to do with my life. When you get engaged, you get asked so many questions! I am not prepared to answer them, I will only make Erika look bad. If only I would win the lottery, then it would all be so simple, right? Isn't that part of the 'American Dream?' I feel pretty depressed. Erika seems upset about some stuff in her personal life too. Compound downess, , what to do? If some interesting job would land on my lap, that would be good too.

And where the hell do these western women come from? Where is $6K for a single piece of jewlery 'cheap'?!?!?!?!!??! You could get a cheap new car for just 3 times that, and a descent one for four times that. And the ring is purely symbolic. I will never understand this. Its not like the ring can be an embodyment of the love. That is a rediculous notion in and of itself. Love can only be embodied in the people, not in their material posessions. And if it were an embodyment of love, why doesn't the man receive one? Is he the only one in love? And should love be quantified in relation of the market value of an accessory? How comes up with this crap!? There are solid reasons for all these practices, but they are null and void now! The reasons are moot in modern culture, and they symbolize nothing by materialism today.

But I do want to get her a ring, because it does mean something to her. And its going to be very difficult. To even save up $6K, which aparently is not alot in this dimension, will be very difficult for me. I just have to not buy anything that I want, and not give anything to my family like what they asked me to contribute, and not go out. And this will take about 20 weeks. And lets say I do this, and I buy the ring, and I propose, what will this change? Except for her new piece of jewlery that people will ask her about, what will change?

A thought just hit me. Maybe she feels rushed because she wants to tell her grandmother that she is engaged while her grandmother is still alive. Its not a morbid thought, it is an honest thought that might be true, so don't be all 'how can you say that, thats so insensitive' but it might be true, and it does make a difference.

This is so depressing.

What is a friend really?

A little about me; I am an iconoclast, and I tend to focus on details. So for me the title of 'friend' is different from 'buddy' or a 'best friend' or a 'girl friend.' Each one of these has a functional definition that is similar but fundamentally different from the other.

My 'buddies' are people I do know, and generally like (as opposed to 'acquaintances' who I don't really know and don't necissarily like, I just happened to have met them and am aware of their existance). But buddies typically don't know me that well and I don't know them that well. Buddies tend to be situation specific. Going through school I am sure we all had buddies; people we would joke around with in school and talk about certain topics, but we wouldn't really hang out with them out side of school and if you tried you would usually find out its pretty hard. The situation creates the relationship, a relationship that would otherwise not exist. Same would go for work, or a dog park, or forum, whatever the situation or locality, but it is limited to that. If you graduated, or stopped going to the forum or park, or left the job, chances are you buddies will fade into memorry.

My 'friends' are people I know well. I keep in touch with them over the years, either by internet or phone or real world meetings. We can do all kinds of stuff with each other, and ask each other for favors or to borrow things and not worry about ever being compinsated for doing that. As you grow older, you don't have as much time and energy to committ to your friends, and thats understandable. As long as we stay in touch and know whats going on with each other and once in a while meet to do something, I consider us friends. It is possible for friendships to fade and move into the 'buddy' category when you fall into a niche where you only meet for one thing, or only communicate in one mode and thats all you do. Its part of growing apart. While I can group my buddies into categories, my friends are much more specific. Because I know my friends more intimately, I have different expectations specific to the personality of each friend. I don't expect all my friends to act the same way or understand things the way I do, its just a fundamental life fact, that people are different, and in dealing with people, you have to do it differently. Its not their fault that they aren’t the friend you want them to be; it is their personality, and if you find it so disagreeable, then you should cut off the friendship, or let it fade into a lesser one, like a buddy.

The requirements for a ‘best friend’ are very steep. I expect a deeper understanding form my best friend than I do from any of my other friends. I expect that my best friend will try their damndest to help me when I need it. My best friends usually know very intimate details about me, and I expect them to keep those secret. When someone asks my best friend about me, they should be able to tell them a synopsis of my situation, because they know me and what is up with me. At this moment I don't feel I have a best friend. I do have really close friends.

I see friendship along the lines of a spectrum. And the divides only exist to be benchmarks to give you an idea of where you are. Someone can be between a best friend and a friend, I would call them a 'close friend' if I had to classify it. My close friends would know my intimate details to varying degrees. I do expect alot from them, but not as much as a best friend. We may know alot about each other and get along really well, and maybe even see each other pretty often, but not necissarily. I believe you can have a close friend who you don't see often, but do share a close bond and a deaper understanding when you do see each other. Maybe if you did see that person more often, that person could be considered a best friend. Or maybe what is keeping them from being a best friend is that they are unreliable (you can't expect them to make it on time or do the appropriate thing or be able to do that favor you need done) but they can still be a confidant and a blast to have around.

Now your girl friend (read 'significant other') is more than a best friend, but not by a lot. Your girl friend should know you most intimately, and be by your side when you are facing off with someone else. Turst should never be an issue with your partner (when I say trust, I am not refering to the type that involves 'what you don't trust me to keep this from falling on you even though I am really weak and this is really heavy,' no, not that kind of ad hoc trust, but of a more fundamental variety, like being able to trust your partner to never hurt you intentionaly, and keep your secrets secret, and that their heart and loyalty lays in you and no one else no matter what). Of course, you have sex with your girl friend (if your lucky, with other people as well).

Some people would disagree with me and have a more simplistic view of friendship. Others might just say, who cares why other qualifying relationships. Well, I learned through the scientific method, so qualifying and classifying is very important to me, and I find it easier to understand the world when you do. You don't have to agree. This is my blog. (I might alter some of these details with further introspection)

One Week Aniversary

I have been blogging for a week. Can't believe I made it.

Jen actually called me back today. We talked for a while. She is officially engaged. I'm happy for her and Joe. But she didn't even call Erika to share her good news, which only shows how far they have grown apart. Erika is a little envious that Jen is engaged, she wants us to get engaged and married ASAP. And I understand that. And I'm working on it, just not at a satisfactory pace for her. Anyway, she is still upset at Jen. I see it as just the normal evolution of a friend ship, especially with a very busy person who lives in a different state. I find Jen's actions forgivable, but I guess I'm just too nice. Jen and Joe are graduating this coming Saturday. They should be back in NYC by mid-May. Jen would have loved going to a strip club I think.

The headset for my PS2 is broken! This is very upsetting, I think I paid $30 for it. And I don't even see where it broke, but the ear piece has come off, and is only hanging on by 1 wire. I will have to super glue it back on I guess. I still hear things and the mic works, its just its falling apart. I played some SOMCOM II for 45minutes or so, and then I played some Sega Rally (SS). I only got like 5 kills, and I couldn't beat the third race. Funny how I consistantly finished in better places on the intermediate track than on the easy track.

Today (this morning) I will be going to Westchester, and then I will be going to Queens Supreme. Tonight Stephen wants to go take pictures, I hope the weather will be cooperative.

May 10, Erika will be done with her Spring semester. I am so excited. For now I have been reminicing about the good times. Funny how I shared some of them with Jen and she didn't remember them. Anyway, I guess I will post this up and go to sleep, unless someone chats me up...(please, wont someone chat me up...)

another lazy sunday morning

actually its 12:30, so its not really morning is it. I had some crazy ass dreams, which I love, and I only remember these dreams when I sleep in. In one of them there were a bunch of roughneck bikers playing video games at Sophia's dacha, except her house was in the Golfpark. As everyone was leaving I caught up with this really big black bad ass biker and was talking to him when i hear a jet come in real low, and I look around and its coming in grazing the tree line along thte road, getting lower and lower and trying to pull up and bounced off the road and went into a flip and crashed into the ground near us. There was no explosion (maybe they were out of fuel), and I was just stammering 'not again NOT AGAIN oh no oh no OH NO' I could barely dail 911 on my cell phone. I could barely move from fear. I finally made my way into the woods and it seemed like cars were passing us by, finally emergency personel started to arive. In my other dream that I remember I was in my 3rd grade class room, except everything was adult sized, and we were having a discussion, and then this guy started talking about Romanians, how they are the most beautiful, and I started arguing and dissing Romania, because its the 2nd poorest country in Europe and other stuff, I was arguing so pastionately that I nearly woke myself up, I could feel me coming out of my dream and hear the things in my reality environment.

Last night I leveled up 1 level in PSO. There were very few people online on the EU ships or the Jap ships. The EU ship with people on it was one of the lower ones, I stayed in the first/top one, because I figured if people were going to join it was more likely to go into the first one. Today at 3PM I will be at Erika's having lunch for whatever special day this is (some sort of holiday).

I love having morning wood! Is anyone else horny?

Apparently its Pass-Over!

I just found out this morning when Erika woke me up. Although when I say morning, it was probably afternoon. We moved Brian's stuff. It was foggy so I didn't bother taking any pictures. Then we tortured Stephen's bladder as Big Joe got his spoiler. I finally satisfied my KFC craving. Then I got home for the special dinner. I got wine spilled over me. I don't really feel like writing. Stephen wants to go out and do something, but doesn't know what. I'm kinda soar from dancing. Weather isn't the best either. My replacement Total Control 3 arrived, haven't tested it out yet. To my disapointment it didn't come boxed. If we don't go out, I think I will be playing the Directors Cut Resident Evil (PS1). I hate family get togethers, its always so damn frustrating and noisy. Maybe I will post more later.

I need a new wardrobe. Something I have said before, maybe next weekend I will do something about it. Need some variety for work. Since we have been going out more, I need more out clothes. Erika got me my present and is keeping it a secret. I hate it when she does that, I don't like surprises. Rain picked up some, and Stephen seems to be waivering, might not end up going anywhere tonight. I'll be happy with that.

Yeah, so Stephen went to take a nap. I went to test out my Total Control 3 replacement, and to my relief it worked great. I played Virtual On: OT (VO:OT) for an hour. VO:OT is so much more fun with Twin Sticks than just a controller. In fact, with just a controller it wasn't fun at all. I tested the adapter with a regular SS controller on Capcom vs. SNK 2 for a half hour, and was very satisfied. I was actually impressed that in thee controller menue it actually recongnized the C and Z buttons not as L and R. Now its too late to get into Resident Evil so I think I will adventure a little online in PSO.